Firstly, to quote the great Gru from Despicable Me: Chillax. Trust me on this. You won't regret it.
Secondly, this does TOO count as a Man-Rule, because when plays were invented by William "Wild Bill Hickock" Shakespeare, waaaaay back in 1927, women weren't allowed to perform, so all the roles in a play (male, female, dog, tree, kumquat, etc.) were played by men. Don't believe me? Look it up! It's true! Men performed all the female roles. Shakespeare got this idea from kabuki theatre, which was created in feudal Japan in 1926 by Arnold Kabuki. Despite what some experts believe, that's when plays were actually invented.
So as you can see, "The Show Must Go On" makes perfect sense as a Man-Rule, even if women have become an important part of the performing arts. Which is a good thing, if you think about it, because without women approximately 91 percent of the pornography industry wouldn't exist. Not to mention the vast majority of people who go to see romantic comedy movies (also known as "rom-coms," which is a kabuki term meaning "not very funny, but guys will go see them anyway in hopes of impressing their dates").
But today we're not talking about who invented the artform known as plays (it was actually a woman named Debbie Playwright; Arnold Kabuki stole her idea). We're talking about the Man-Rule that grew out of centuries of dedication by performers, performers who valued entertainment and the accolades of an audience, performers who had one overriding desire: to get paid.
But they also thought it was a good idea that the show, once it started, should continue. And that brings us to today's stirring example of the Rule: Mark Donnelly.
Mark, in case you don't know, is the national anthem singer for the Vancouver Canucks hockey team in Canada. Now, those of us here at Man-Rules Corporate Headquarters aren't big hockey fans, so we don't know what typically happens when Mark sings the Canadian national anthem. Recently, though, Mark got all dolled up in a tuxedo, brushed his flowing locks till he had them styled exactly like he likes them, and put on a pair of ice skates to skate around the arena while he sang the national anthem just before the start of a hockey game.
Unfortunately, a couple of things tripped Mark up:
1) There was a bright spotlight on him as he skated and sang his way across the ice;
2) Vancouver had rolled out the red carpet for him (literally).
So as Mark was singing and skating away, he didn't see the carpet laid on the ice. With predictable results:
Notice, though: Even when Mark fall flat on his face after hitting the carpet, and then has a hard time getting up, he DOESN'T STOP SINGING. Dude may be a long-haired Canadian, but he knows the importance of keeping the show going no matter what.
We're particularly impressed that Mark had the presence of mind to get the crowd to help him sing, while he took a few moments to skate around after falling. He even held the microphone away from his mouth so it wouldn't pick up his voice as he cussed in pain. I bet he invented several new swear words that with any luck will be saved for posterity.
So here's to you, Mark Donnelly. You may be the only guy wearing tails on the ice at a hockey game, but for that brief shining moment, you were a Man.
(c) 2014 John Puckett
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