Man-Rule: No Selfies

Here at The Man Rules, we keep our fingers on the pulse of popular culture, and we're incredibly in tune with the latest happenings and trends among young people. That enables us to take a proactive stance for or against any brand-new, cutting-edge phenomena that many of you may not even know about.

Today's topic is one such recently emerging trend. If you're lost as you read this, please forgive us; it's the price we pay for being so up-to-date.

Thanks to modern technology, some computers, and indeed, even some tablets and devices known as "smart-phones," have built in to them tiny cameras that allow users to take photographs. Unfortunately, some people have used these cameras to take self-portraits, or, as they're known in hep-cat street parlance, "selfies."

We'd like to believe that males would be above this vanity, but sadly, that's not the case. So we're discussing today's Man-Rule: No Selfies.

Think about it: Who are some of the most impressive Men in history? Jesus, of course. Hercules. George Washington. Sherlock Holmes. Bear Bryant. Whoever invented the wheel. Ludwig von Beethoven. Know what they have in common? None of them ever took a "selfie."

Many guys have taken selfies in an attempt to look tough, or (we're just guessing here) impress their friends and / or women with their ability to make duck lips and look into a mirror. Usually these efforts have disastrous results. For example, this poor fellow ignored both the "No Selfies" and "No Tattoos" Man-Rules, and paid the price:

The most charitable explanation of this is the boy's last name is "Exreme." We can only hope.

But exposing your tattoo artist's lack of spelling acumen isn't the only thing that can go wrong when you take a selfie. You can appear to be a shallow, lonely, desperate person who attempts to fool the entire Internet into thinking you have a significant other:

The inherent problem with guys taking selfies is obvious: It's a guy trying to make himself the center of attention for no other reason than wanting to be the center of attention. A real Man doesn't seek out attention. A real Man quietly goes about his job with no fanfare or fuss, only wanting to do his very best, his muscles rippling smoothly and his rugged yet handsome countenance focused on the computer screen as he writes in his blog. Selfies, in contrast, are the product of an insecure guy looking for validation from without, rather than within.

Now, we're not saying a Man should never be photographed. That's ridiculous. Many great Men, including Bear Bryant and George Washington, were photographed as they performed manly feats, such as coaching Alabama to a national championship in football or standing in a boat as random guys rowed it across the Delaware River. The obvious difference is they didn't stop to photograph themselves; they were content to let others take the photos while they did their jobs.

So if you're a guy, and you're desperate to be photographed, our advice is to do your job to the best of your ability. Be a Man, doing Manly things, and you'll get your share of photos without having to take selfies. Become a great athlete, or a business leader, or a movie star, or even -- dare we say -- President of the United States. You'll have plenty of people taking photos of you without having to stoop to the indignity of taking a selfie.

Okay, maybe being President isn't the best example to use.

(c) 2015 John Puckett

How can you be Manly without taking a selfie? Glad you asked!

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